Written by: 
dilyana.georgieva Sunday, 16 August, 2020 - 23:32

Why Are We Waiting For Tomorrow to Start Living?

We’re always talking about getting on with our lives. Well, we are. We get on with our lives. This is it. Maybe the problem is that I’ve always been driven by my wants. My life’s always been about tomorrow. And the idea that life is now… it’s horrible.

We all know the expressions: “Live for the moment”, “Carpe diem” and “Seize the day”, and I believe many of us do exactly that. But there is another group of people, a group quite different in their perception of life. Maybe not so much because they like it that way, but simply because they don't know how to change it. These are the people who are constantly waiting for the future to start their lives. These are the people I am interested in writing about. 

Are you confused? Understandably, not everyone can explain how this is possible. Why should someone put off their dreams, their happiness, everything that makes them human? The truth is that these people do not intend to postpone all of this. Some of them may not even realise that they are doing it until many years have passed and they look back to see with horrifying pain how much time has gone by and how little they have tried to make their lives the way they always dreamt it would be. 

Whatever you have to do, do it now, or it will be too late, some may say.  But somehow, from so much beating the idea that 'now is the time to live' into their heads, they start to put too much energy into thinking about how to live the best way, how to make those years memorable, what to do so they won't regret the missed opportunities when they're old and grey. All these questions take up a huge part of their lives and especially their time, which they cannot fill because the answers do not come. Time, time, time… They want to do everything, but they don't know where to start and that's why they end up doing nothing. And they waste precious time, which is too important to waste. The tragic irony can sometimes be painful. I've been saying them but actually the more accurate pronoun would be us. I think most of us have felt that strange and inexplicable feeling of nothingness in one's day, waiting for it to pass and hoping for a better tomorrow. But it never comes. Tomorrow is always tomorrow, it's always a dream day in the future, and today is always today, grey and gloomy.  

This constant anticipation  is not a sign of sadness or depression. However, it is not exactly a sign of a happy life either. I think it is something in between and maybe that is the scariest place to be, because you are not sad, you don't have a reason to be. But you are also not happy even though your life may be pretty amazing. 

The truth is that we know the art of wasting our time too well. We spend more of it on dreaming and less on plans and their realisation. We are constantly making plans for the future. We study to have a good career afterwards. We want to go somewhere, to see the world, to get to know ourselves, but only when we have the time. The thought that 'later' is already here and the future is now the present, is a permanent part of my consciousness and does not give me peace. And I have so many plans, goals and dreams. When will it be my turn to make them a reality? Maybe when I'm more settled, with a secure job and a secure income. But such a stable moment is not coming and the truth is that it will never come. Security does not appear in a flash one morning and does not say: here I am, now you can do what you always wanted because now is the right time. 

The right time does not exist. Every moment of our lives can be the right time for that forgotten dream, but if you do not tell yourself that you will pursue it now, then the right time will never come. The truth is that the right time is an illusion that we create ourselves and whether it will exist or not depends only on us. If you don't tell yourself that you are ready to fight for what you want and what you believe in, even if your life is a huge mess right now, you will never escape it. Create the right time. Only you have the power to do it. 

I know that life is not eternal and that sometimes it goes by frighteningly fast. But we should not be afraid of its speed. Life really is about the journey, not the destination. We have to remind ourselves that the journey started the moment we were born and it's not waiting somewhere in the future. It is now, and that is the most certain thing we know. Therefore, we better enjoy it. Don't plan to go to that place when you have more free time, just go now. Don't wait until it is convenient, because it never will be. And that is the reason to do it. If you doubt that this is the thing for you, is there really any other way to answer this if you don't just try it now? Have no expectations, because if it is meant to be it will be. Some things need to happen when you are mature enough to appreciate them. It is possible to say to ourselves years later that we should have done something differently from what we chose. It is also possible to say to ourselves that we did everything we thought was right when it happened. I hope we choose the latter. I hope we do not forget that happiness can always be with us, as long as we allow it to be. 


 

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